The (Almost) Perfect Life

Improving in these five areas might help you at least look the part of someone who’s got it all.

We've all said, "If I could just change this one thing about myself, my life would be perfect." Well, we're all a bunch of liars. If you haven't heard before, perfection doesn't exist … at least not where we're concerned. So, unless you moonlight as a god (sex god not included), you're never gonna find that pinnacle of perfection that you seek.

But, as the old adage goes, there's always room for improvement. And that goes for all areas of life - including the financial, emotional and physical areas.

Following are five things you can improve on to at least feel like you've got it all.

1. Going Public (Speaking)

I recently had to give a two-hour talk in front of 50 people. I wasn't nervous. I wasn't tense. But I was excited. You, on the other hand, might sweat at the mere thought of public speaking. It's no wonder - one of the top fears among human beings is public speaking. It actually sometimes ranks ahead of fear of death. So how do we change this? First, begin by choosing a topic that no one knows better than you - even if it's The Smurfs. And once you've done research, finding out how many times "How far now, Papa Smurf?" was asked in the cartoon's history, choose an audience. Your friends wouldn't be a bad first choice. After all, they've probably already seen you passed-out drunk in a baby carriage, so you can't embarrass yourself in front of them anymore than you already have.

Next, get the note cards you'll read from … and throw them in the garbage. If you have a table nearby for your speech, it's fine to have one sheet to glance at every five minutes or so, but the easiest way to be a bad speaker is to be a reader. You also should realize that you won't be able to remember all of your prepared speech - and that's OK. It's better to say four out of your six points with confidence than to rush in an attempt to get in all six points. You'll speak too quickly, get nervous from trying to remember everything and you'll accomplish nothing. There's no such thing as a perfect speech, only speeches that get their messages across. After testing your speech on friends, start volunteering to give talks on behalf of local charities and such. Nothing makes you a better public speaker than just doing it - and nothing gives businesspeople more confidence in working with you than seeing your confidence in front of a crowd.

2. Sitting On The Bench

Safe bet: Some guy right now is asking another guy: "How much can you bench press?" He would ask how much the other person makes, but that would be impolite. So that you can be impressive next time you're asked if you're a bench-pressing behemoth, here are some ways to up your poundage.

First, experiment with your grips. Some lifters prefer having their hands a thumb's distance from the end of the grip part of the bar, while others seem to respond better to slightly wider or shorter grips (wider usually means you have stronger shoulders, shorter can mean stronger triceps).

Next, ask yourself where you tend to get stuck within your last rep? Does the bar always seem to stop a few inches off your chest, or do you find the rep dies just when you're about to finish it? If it's the bottom of the rep that's weaker, get a partner and make a habit of doing bench presses that require your arms to only go halfway up. If it's the top part of the rep then - you guessed it - do half reps only going from the top to halfway down. British Nationals Champion Jamo Nezzar firmly believes in analyzing your "sticking points." "I've seen a lot of people have a poor bench press because they lift at a bad angle," he says, "or didn't develop certain muscle groups to drive the weight through. How can you have a great bench [press] if you don't develop your shoulders?"

And your bench pressing shouldn't always end just because you can't do another rep. When that happens, try doing half-reps until exhaustion. Then, do quarter-reps. Then, just try to push the bar an inch off the rack. Don't repeat this intense regimen every time, but remember that big goals come from accomplishing small goals - and consider a full rep the big goal.

3. Dating Better Women

Before we tell you how to do this, first you have to define what "better" is. Some guys just want someone who will watch movies with them and give them tons of hugs. Others just want a girl with a killer body that keeps her hugs to herself when it's not time for midnight loving. Some like women who can't get enough of museums, while others just want someone who can appreciate the Marx brothers more than Manet. After you get an idea of your perfect woman, consult friends you trust for some minor adjustments. Though you may not know it, some of the things you crave may actually be bad for you, and your friends can fill you in.

Rule No. 1: Your pick-up lines need to pick up and leave. Sure, you saw a guy pull off these lines once, but you should understand that they succeeded in spite of their cheesiness - not because of it. Maybe that night, the woman just wanted a sculpted Greek God, so she overlooked the fact he sounded like a scripted Geek Clod. Bottom line: The better women just don't fall for this crap.

Another thing to remember is that better women are not just the better women at the bar or club. Expand your scope to include the whole world. For example, while dating at work can be disastrous, meeting women at professional events can be dating bliss. Better women tend to, um, have jobs and stuff.

Finally, remember that intelligence in a woman is a good thing. So before you look at her chest, listen to what she has to say - at least for a little while. Does she sound like she's got a good head on her boobs? If so, keep talking. If not, cross her off the list. Fact: Dumb women aren't challenging unless you're in a coma.

4. Make More Money

At the end of City Slickers, Billy Crystal had learned two things, one of which was that he had not-so-normal feelings for a calf. But he also learned that you shouldn't quit your profession, just do it better. The second lesson is an apt one. You probably have numerous opportunities to make more money in your profession that you're just not seeing. Ask yourself three things: Who are the people doing better than me in my profession? Why are they doing better? What can I do to become as good as them? And here's an even better idea: Ask them yourself. Learning from others more successful than us usually leads to our own success.

Have you ever considered working for yourself? You're probably thinking, "I have to quit my job and gamble on my own business? That's crazy!" But if you can find just five extra hours a week to devote to a side business, it may grow to the point where you'd be stupid to keep your present job. When you work for someone else, you can make the company millions and not see a dime. By owning your own business, the money you make for your company actually (ka-ching!) goes into your pocket. Also, you may find helpful tax write-offs working for yourself that could never be possible working for someone else!

5. Long Live …

The fountain of youth - doesn't exist. Therefore, it's gonna take a lot of effort to squeeze out a few more years. Begin by, surprise, eating and exercising more (sorry, but thin people just have a habit of living longer). Next, find happiness. Part of how you live longer is by actually having something to live for. That means filling your life with friends, maybe a special someone and hobbies that make it all worthwhile. Not to go all God on ya, but studies also show that belief in a higher power gives you more staying power - as in staying on this Earth. And one more way to live longer is to master the first four tips mentioned above. After all, if public-speaking, bench-pressing, better-dating money-makers don't live until 100 years old, who will?